Got Guilt???? I do!

This morning was hard, and I feel guilty!

My son crawled in bed with me at 6 am to snuggle. Now I really wish that he would stay in his own bed but I know that one day he wont need to snuggle with me so.....I said,' if you can climb up here, you can be here'. He was then trying to say something and for the life of me, I couldnt understand, he was frustrated beyond belief......this was how our day started.

I then got up, dressed, laundry, got the kids up and dressed.....even with a visual schedule I have to put the sense of urgency in them. *for all that is Holy, they can not miss that bus!* My son then starts crying that I wont help him get dressed. He is perfectly capable *finally* to pick out a shirt and pants and put them on, if he needs help, I help, but he has to try. Then my daughter is crabby because her brother is crying......again......I am exhausted writing this.

Then the struggle to eat, brush teeth, shoes, and get on the bus. He pitched a fit the entire morning. There is even 'stay n play' at his school. He loves when the parents come, he loves when we come. My husband had to be at work and I.....couldnt do it today. I feel guilty that I dont have it in me to be with my kid at school. I feel horrible that he struggles so much. This is my chance to show the school that he is awesome with his communication device and I am choosing to not go! I feel horrible that he is going to be upset that I didnt come.

My daughter struggles to get ready and stay on task (but somehow she is a superstar at school). She loves school, she loves her "friends" (in her world everybody she can see is a friend), she loves to learn, etc. My son hates to socialize, he tolerates other kids in his space..........

My kids NEED so much of me and I am tired. I feel guilty for not having enough of me to go around, I feel guilty that I am writing this now instead of being at his school, I feel guilty that I am never at my daughter's school. I just feel guilty.

I need to drop this guilt like a bad habit. I know that I am doing the best I can. I know that my kids know I am there for them. Now I am picking myself up and dusting myself off and I am going to get to work. The guilt can go.