I often wonder ‘Am I doing the right thing?’ I think I ask myself that at least one time a day. Am I doing right by my Husband, my Daughter? Am I doing everything I could be doing?
I have this overwhelming NEED to have approval. I have this NEED to be the better person. I have this NEED for perfection. My Husband wishes I have this perfection towards my house but for some reason that has never developed. I wish I had the perfect family but I don’t. But then I think, what is a perfect family? A mom, dad, 2.5 kids a dog?? Well we have one kid, one dog and two parents. I guess we are 1.5 kids to ‘perfect’!
Our daughter will never have the family that I dreamed of. She will never have late night sleepovers with Cousins. She will not have big family cookouts. She might even be an only child.
My husband and my’s immediate families are small and spread out and often are strained relationships at best. She only has one Cousin right now to speak of and she will more than likely never meet him. She has Aunts and Uncles whom she will never know. She is the one who is going to suffer, or will she? If she never knows of these individuals will she miss someone she has never known? Am I doing her a disservice by not exposing her to the nuttiness of ‘our family’?
I see others that have picture perfect families with reunions and picnics galore…..I hope there is more to see what is on the surface. In actuality do I HAVE the normal family? I guess only time will tell……..
G honey, there is NO such thing as a perfect family, only in a magazine will you see such a thing, because those stories are made up to seem perfect. You can choose whether or not you want to subject yourself to chaos, or a non-chaotic family life by interaction with family you may personally not be close with.. After all, in MOST Families, Friends are the ONLY Real Family some truly have, (me for example).
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